Thank you to all of our mom's and our family and friends who joined us to celebrate mom's life with us on Saturday, August 28 at Desert Botanical Gardens in Phoenix, Arizona. It was a pleasure to see all of you in such a beautiful setting.
I wanted to share my tribute to our mom with everyone who was unable to attend in person. We invite all of you to leave comments on this blog to share any of your own stories about our mom.
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I am so pleased to see so many of our mom’s friends and family here today. Thank you for coming to celebrate our mom’s life. I want to share with you my memories of Suzy as our mom.
My friends used to call our mom “Super Mom,” and it was the perfect nickname for her. Mom made things happen. She was everywhere, all the time, whenever any of us needed her. And that never changed, even as we grew older and moved away from Arizona.
As children, mom indulged us in every activity where we showed even the slightest interest. She encouraged David to take up the drums, and let him practice in the house at all hours of day and night. Rob was the devoted swimmer, and mom would wake up impossibly early to get him to practice and swim meets all over town. I discovered art, and mom was always finding new art supplies for me and even framed a few of my pieces to inspire me to continue painting. And she drove Matt to the middle of the desert on hot summer days to launch massive rockets into the sky—and then drove across town to retrieve the rockets.
Our mom was a true Arcadia mom and a mother to many. Growing up, our house was where all of our friends came to jump on our trampoline, eat our red vines, swim in our pool—or maybe jump off the roof into the pool, or jump off the roof onto the trampoline. They also came to talk with our mom. Our mom made everyone in the neighborhood feel welcome at our home, and she seemed to be the happiest when her house was full of our friends for afternoon pool parties that inevitably turned into slumber parties.
Mom’s warmth and open heart endeared her to our childhood friends, and she cherished them as if they were her own children. She was a confidant for many, to the point where, if anyone ever wandered away from a slumber party, they could usually be found in the kitchen talking with mom, which was where they had been for the past hour.
As a daughter, I had a special relationship with my mom that flourished through a number of mother and daughter activities. Though I would have rather been playing soccer or swimming—or, really, doing anything that my brothers were doing—my mom made sure we had mother/daughter time together starting with Brownies and Girl Scouts, where mom was, of course, always our troop leader. When I was older, we joined National Charity League and volunteered together all over the Valley, delivering meals to older adults, handing out medals at the Special Olympics, and starting an afterschool program for children living at UMOM.
Watching my mom reach out to every woman and child she met with unconditional love, I came to understand my mom’s passion and commitment for supporting and strengthening her community. Our shared experiences volunteering together are what inspired me to build my career working in nonprofits and philanthropy. Now, every day that I go to work, I think about my mom and thank her for helping me find my passion in my career.
As an adult, I grew exceptionally close to my mom. We shared so much together, including our birthdays. My mom was my best friend. When mom came to visit us in New York, I brought her with me everywhere. She would visit me at work so often that my colleagues dubbed her the Citi Foundation’s “official mascot.” Mom was a cheerleader for everyone she ever knew, and my work colleagues were no exception. She would walk around the office and talk with each of my colleagues, offering them the same support and encouragement she showed each of us as her children.
Mom was always eager to visit when we were having parties because she wanted to see all of our friends and get caught up on their lives; she knew all of their names and where they worked, and she loved their children as if they were her own grandchildren. And our friends were just as eager to spend time catching up with our mom.
In the last few years, my mom and I took the opportunity to travel together around the world. We spent time in London and Barcelona seeing shows, admiring Gaudi’s architecture, eating delicious Catalan food, and shopping. But, our real adventure occurred when we traveled to South Africa for two weeks together. We toured most of the country, spending four days on safari in Kruger National Park feeling like children every time the elephants appeared. I’ll never forget how mom’s face lit up when the rhinos sauntered up to our jeep, or the smile she had while watching the penguins on Boulders Beach. It was an unforgettable experience to be able to share all of this with my mom.
My husband and I also took mom sailing in the Caribbean to share our favorite islands with her. It took awhile for mom to get used to living on a boat. She kept asking us, “What can I do?” and we kept saying, “Nothing. That’s the whole point. Just sit back, grab a book, and enjoy the warm sun and the calm of the ocean.” Mom was so used to always being in charge and having everyone depend on her; but, not knowing how to run the boat meant she had to let go. And, when she finally did, about a week into the trip and just a few days before we were headed back home, and it was so pleasing to watch her slowly relax and just enjoying the moments when we were sailing, walking on the beach, and or floating in the cool water.
Mom had the most amazing and infectious smile. Her smile truly lit up a room and made people gravitate toward her throughout her entire life. Her smile was in her eyes, which would squint and glisten when she was really happy or excited, and in her rosy cheeks, which would glow an even brighter pink as her smile spread across her face. When she smiled, no one could be sad. And when she laughed so hard that she cried, you knew that she was really truly happy. For me, there was nothing better than to look across a room and see my mom with that smile on her face. The memory of her smile is one thing I will always carry with me.
But, above all else, our mom knew the value of family and she warmly welcomed each of our spouses as her own children. She often told us how proud of us she was for becoming such loving and caring people, but she was most proud of us for finding partners who would be our best friends and encourage us to pursue our dreams as she had always done.
My mom and I both said that we were lucky to have each other. She was the most amazing mom a woman could ever have, and she told me how lucky she was to have me as her daughter. Being a mom was her most important role in life, and she went above and beyond any call of duty. I can only hope that one day I can be the mom to my children that she was to my brothers and me.
As tragic as it is to lose our amazing mother too soon, she has influenced all of us in ways we are only beginning to know, and there are pieces of our mom that will live on in each of us. David shares her sense of humor; Rob shares her ability to connect with people; I share her sense of community and goodwill; and Matt shares her unending kindness and compassion. Nothing can replace the space in our lives that was filled by our mom’s love, which only she was the right shape to fit, but our shared love for our mom will forever keep us united as siblings.
-Rebecca Van Sickle
